Over and over again
I prayed for the desire of my heart,
For a home by the ocean,
For the crush of sand beneath my feet.
To contemplate the blue sea
Flowing far away,
Falling over the horizon.
You heard my prayer.
And You gave me a home with a view of the ocean,
Where I could sit, protected by locked glass doors,
And watch the ships in the harbor,
Sailboats on weekends,
The colored lights of ferry boats
Giving visibility on black ocean nights
You granted me rest.
Is this not what You have called me to?
The ocean is my heartâ€™s desire,
My refuge, a place of peace,
Filled with Your Might,
Teeming with life,
Much of it below the surface where I cannot see.
And I walked along the surf,
And the breakers rolled in and lapped around my feet,
Sometimes the swells returning
The debris of manâ€™s castoff refuse.
And as I prayed
Slowly the ache in my heart subsided
For You were there in the whitecaps,
In the fish jumping,
In the dolphins playing in the sea,
In the birds dancing in and out of the saturated sand.
You were there in the power of the waves crashing,
In each pattern as the water spread into thin foamy pools
Eventually washing clean the scars imprinted on the beach.
In the loneliness,
For time with my children.
And they came.
We played in the water, my family and I,
Spray across our faces,
Kimberly and Rachel princesses in sand castles;
Joshua at one with the water showing us how to body
To swim out and allow the waves to roll us back in,
Heather tumbling and spinning
Giving the unborn Sophia a roller coaster ride
The water carrying her where it would,
Shawn laughing as Rachel pulled Heather back to shore.
And you awoke me early one morning
To savor Your sunrise,
The sky filled with cotton candy pink clouds
The sun rising over the horizon beneath,
The heavens reflecting pink light
Spread across the water
Like a pool of melted crayon,
Four stadium lights on a solitary ship
Creating golden paths across the shimmering pink harbor.
On the day of the storm.
You showed me the ocean a mighty force,
The waves crashing over the barrier
The wind whipping across the balcony
Rain knocking against my locked glass doors
Bulging them inward,
A subdued hint of Your Power
In the water, in the wind, in the storm.
And you gave me a home,
Where family and friends may come,
Where physical and spiritual healing is possible,
Where I have seen Your Everlasting Lovingkindness.
And like the waves, Father,
You carry me where You want me to be
And You call to me.
I walk along the shore and I ask,
Although afraid of what You might say.
You have given me the desire of my heart;
What is it You ask of me?
Nancy Ellen Dodd
A writer and editor with many voices, Nancy Dodd received her Masterâ
€™s in Professional Writing (MPW) from the University of Southern
California with a concentration in dramatic writing/screenwriting and her
MFA in playwriting at the USC School of Theatre. She has received
awards for her writing and her short stories have aired on public radio.
Her journalistic career includes publishing more than 125 articles in local
and national publications. Currently on faculty at Pepperdine
University, Nancy teaches screenwriting and serves as editor of the
Graziadio Business Report, an online business practitionerâ€™s journal.
The photo above is Nancy's view from her oceanfront home.